I read an interesting article today on Matt Walsh's blog (http://themattwalshblog.com/2014/08/05/i-will-not-teach-my-kids-about-safe-sex/) about sex.
I say that this article is interesting because it completely challenged everything I thought I had known and believed about abstinence.
For me, as a current Christian teen in a very worldly world, I've always been a part of the camp that is for 100% abstinence but...... (and this is a very emphatic but), since teens in this worldly world will probably have sex
anyway, why not educate, equip, and inform them on what it means to practice "safe sex"?
In his article, Matt discusses how such safe sex practices can never be 100% effective because of the inexorable, inexplicable, inescapable (I've run out of SAT vocabulary....
) emotional and spiritual nature of sex, and how using a condom or taking birth control can never mute the soul-tying aspects of sex that it brings to all participants. As Matt says, "safe sex" will never truly be safe sex... and I agree with that.
Although I am the first one to take issue with the delivery of Matt's truths (I often find him too harsh to gently convey
the love that Christianity is built upon), I think that he is really, really real. And I think that what he wrote in this here article makes a lot of sense.
I thought that his point here was super, super poignant. When you open yourself up to sex, you're opening yourself up to both emotional and physical vulnerability, shame, hurt, and confusion. Whether you really love the person that you are engaging in sex with or not, you are totally exposing your nakedness and sorrow to another individual. You are giving them your body, your heart, and your spirit through this seemingly only physical act, and supposing that nothing could be wrong with getting some action if it hurts nobody. I can see that argument... really, I can. God made us human and he gave us these huge sexual appetites that really began to form at the onset of puberty, and then expected for us to wait a good 10-20-30 years for us to finally utilize that sexual appetite in marriage. What? Where dey do that at?
Matt Walsh then goes on to say:
And I also thought this was powerful, as well. His assertion is that even in marriage, sex is vulnerable and scary and provocative and consuming and all these things... but it is only the bonds of marriage and the promise of commitment through thick/thin, sickness/health, good times/bad times that can cushion and secure this weird and vulnerable (I've probably used this word 100 times in this post, hahahaha) and volatile thing we like to call sex. It is only through marriage, through making that ultimate commitment to your spouse and that ultimate commitment to God, can sex and its weirdness become stable and secure and giving and loving. It's a strange concept, but that's sex for you.
I think that our society and our day has perverted and exploited the already vulnerable/volatile/crazy/confusing concept of sex and has even gone as far to showcase such intimate/crazy/confusing/whatever/whatever matters in popular forms of media, like pornography or adult movies. Knowing that big-whig executives are getting paid millions to capitalize on sex and and all of it's emotional vulnerabilities for both partners involved, and turn it into something that is instant gratification and instant self-pleasure is a little displeasing to me, if I have to be honest. As someone who has been there before, I think that pornography truly does cheapen sex and it truly does create false expectations for sex that just don't work in reality.
Sex and sexuality is not shameful in anyway, but I think there is a definite venue for it, and online for millions of people to see is definitely not the venue. To take one of the most intimate acts of human kind and then distort and pervert it... hmmmmm. It's a wonder why God is so merciful towards us, when we are so blatantly hellbent on doing our own thing at our own time and taking HIS own creations and purposes and perverting them for our sinful purposes. I truly do think that even those we've been given these sexual appetites at puberty and it's very hard to keep it all under control until the time for a committed and stable marriage comes, I know that God had something bigger in store for us than to just exploit our sex drives in the consumption of pornography or premarital sex. I was at a seminar last month, and the pastor expressed that it's highly possible that God gave us our natural feelings and desires for sex at a young age so we could grow and learn to master it and be in control of our sex drive (AND NOT LET IT CONTROL US!!!!) until it was time to marry.
And that sentiment is very comforting to me. God is always like a bazillion steps ahead of me and my plans, and I am thankful that He has a purpose for everything that He does, and that He has a purpose for you and for me. Let us try to live our lives in purity folks. I know it is hard... matter of fact, man....
But He is
able willing to forgive and cleanse and save us from ourselves and from what the world wants of us. He is willing to be our
Righteousness and set us all free from the chains that carnal lusts, pornography, sexual fantasies, try to shackle upon us. 1 Corinthians 10:13 also delves into this grace perfectly and succinctly..... if you or anyone you know has struggled with a sin of this nature (or of any nature, to be honest), you can be set free. God will make a way of escape, God will provide a path of light, God will cleanse your heart and renovate your mind, if you just allow Him to.
I hope that some of these insights may help with anybody who has struggled in this topic and is looking for a way out.
'Cause look! The Savior of the World is saying that it's okay, you're okay, and you are ALREADY delivered from whatever was holding you back! John 8:36, anyone? Free indeed, free indeed!
Have a great afternoon, everybody! Comment below if you would like to have your voice heard... discussions are always more fun when it's not just me talking .